My Name is Jali

Don't you hate that line when somebody breaks up with you and they say some version of "it's not you, it's me"? Well, I say, you are absolutely right! You might be saying it to make me feel better, when secretly, you really believe it's me, but whether you realize it or not, you're speaking truth. We need to take ownership of that knowledge. Get this: If you know that you are the best person that you can possibly be at that moment in time And you are trying your hardest to stay true to yourself while respecting the other person And making every effort possible to maintain that relationship And it still doesn't work, you can believe that it's not you. Don't waste your time on the "whys" and "hows" of the relationship falling apart As tempting as that is to do Don't focus on what you could have done differently and how you could have been more supportive of the other person As hard as it is not to Don't a...

It's no secret that I have not enjoyed my college experience at all... A big part of it was that I did not want to come here in the first place so there was already a black mark on my attitude about college in general... When I got here I called myself giving it a chance by becoming part of a clique. The clique broke up and I took that as an excuse to condemn the rest of my time here and I have been miserable ever since. This is gonna sound like a pity party for a minute but bear with me, I promise it's going somewhere! But anyway... I hated that the school was so small, it was in the middle of nowhere, there was no public transportation, I had to ask people for rides if I wanted to go ANYWHERE off campus, everybody was either part of a Greek letter organization or wanted to be a part of one, I was trying to stay saved and there was no church around where I felt comfortable and there weren't that many saved people on campus who were trying to hold on like I was, and ...

You know that song from Rodgers and Hammerstein's Cinderella ? When Brandy sings, "In my own little corner, in my own little chair, I can be whoever I want to be"? Well, that happens to be one of my ALL TIME favorite songs even to this day because to me it shows the message that you don't need anyone else around you to have a good time or to feel good about yourself I was always belting out "I'm glad to be back in my own little corner... all alone, in my own, little chair..." Because in that little corner in the little chair, nobody else mattered, and nobody else could bother you. But one day I came to a VERY disturbing reality. Eventually, you have to come out of the corner, and the longer you stay in it, the harder it is to adjust to the rest of the world. And the easier it is to retreat back to the corner, hiding. I'm sitting at work, music on blast, with the door closed and a sign on the front door telling people that if they don't ...