The Thing About Being a Christian...

So here's the thing about being a Christian...

There seem to be a lot of misconceptions out there about what it means to live saved and to be holy. People who aren't saved don't seem to understand the true joys of living holy, and that giving your life over to Christ is not giving up who you are, it's REALIZING who you are in Him! God never intended for us to be carbon copies of one another, and yet He wants the same thing for all of us: eternal life with Him. So I'm here to talk about some of the stereotypes that are out there about those of us who have chosen to leave the world behind and follow Him. Raise your hand if you see one you recognize. 

1. Christians are supposed to be nice all the time - This one makes me laugh. Because truth be told, I'm not that nice, and I'm not that sweet. And most people figure that out after being around me for more than... an hour? And to be quite honest, I don't believe that I HAVE to be simply because I'm a Christian. I believe that everyone has personal characteristics that God uses to help us each fulfill the plan He has for us. Some of us ARE nice and sweet in personality, while others are a little more spicy and feisty. And I believe it takes all kinds to not only get things done in our individual lives, but also collectively, especially when it comes to Kingdom building. 

    Don't get me wrong; We are ALL commanded to love one another (Mark 12:31). But that doesn't mean that I'm going to be full of daisies and lilies every time you see me. Sometimes I'm going to tell you some truths you don't want to hear, in a tone that you're not going to want to hear it in. I might have to set some boundaries that you may try your darnedest to cross. And I won't be able to be nice about it, depending on the situation.

     Some of the ADJECTIVES  that describe the Fruit of the Spirit (adjectives, not separate fruits) are meekness, gentleness, and self-control. And I believe that if you have the Holy Spirit, even if those things aren't your personal strong suit, you have the ability to exercise them when the situation calls for it. But that doesn't mean everyone has to be gentle, meek, and holding back ALL the time.

     God's not even nice. He's loving, yes. He's merciful, yes. He cares for us and gives us blessings even when we don't deserve them, yes. But He's not necessarily "nice." He doesn't let us have our way all the time, and He doesn't give us everything we want. We go through struggles, and sometimes it seems that He just allows trouble to pile up on us. When that's happening, how many of us are giving thumbs-up to God, saying, "Gee Lord, you're so nice to me!"? Nah.

      But the wonderful thing about MY God is that He IS kind, and loving, and generous, and so even when it feels like He's leading us through walls of thorns, we can know that He has a plan for us, and that He intends for us to be better and to have better when it's all over. 

     So here's the thing about being a Christian: While I don't believe God has called me to be NICE all the time, He has called me to be LOVING all the time, and willing to help those who need help. Sometimes that looks like calling up a family member to tell them I love them, because I have a feeling that they need to hear it. That's not being nice; it's being honest, and helpful. Sometimes it looks like fussing at one of the young people at church because they were behaving inappropriately during service. That's actually love. In fact, one of the girls told me earlier this year that I wasn't being nice, and I'll tell you what I told her: "I don't have to be nice, I love you!"

2. Christians are about positivity and being happy - I've seen this comment on so many Facebook posts, YouTube videos, Twitter feeds, WHATEVER! Just like Christians aren't necessarily nice all the time, we're not necessarily happy and positive all the time, either! Yes, the Bible talks about being content in every situation (Philippians 4:11), but to be honest, when I have $3 in my bank account, half a tank of gas in the car, no food in the fridge, rent is due next week, and I'm not certain if my check is going to be ready on payday... I'm not too happy in that moment. When there's drama in the family and everyone seems to have lost their minds, I'm not particularly full of positive thoughts right then and there.

     So here's the thing about being a Christian: I can be CONTENT in the knowledge that, even though I'm not particularly comfortable in the moment, God has never let me go hungry, He has never left me without a place to lay my head, and I don't believe He's going to start now. Even though people around me are acting crazy, God has continued to keep us all safe and healthy. So I can go to sleep with peace in my heart no matter the situation. 

     In addition, being a Christian is not about doing what I want and getting what I want when I want it. Being a Christian is about being a follower of Christ, and being obedient to Him at all times. If something's anti-Biblical, then it's not something that I can stand for or participate in. That might bother me temporarily, but I've learned from experience, that if I just hold to His hand and build my hopes on things eternal, He always has something better. So beware of "motivational" speeches, and "inspiring" quotes. Because if it's not Biblical, no matter how good it sounds, it's not God. Not too positive, I know, but what can I say...

3. Christians are miserable and don't enjoy life - Whoa!!! I'm sorry to tell you, but we are LIVE in these pews!!! *Snaps fingers two times* Okay, okay, I know I just spent the last few paragraphs telling you how living a saved and holy life is not all sunshine and rainbows, but PLEASE believe, ain't nobody miserable over here! I know some miserable people, and I can tell you... they don't look like me! Now, it's true, there are some people who profess salvation whose faces are so puckered you expect them to close right up any minute now. But, er um uh.... remember that Fruit of the Spirit I mentioned earlier? Yeah, the second adjective that describes it is JOY! Have you ever had an experience that was so powerful, so moving, that at one point, you almost felt like you were flying? Multiply that feeling by like 10,000 and that's what it feels like to be in the presence of the Lord. 

     But aside from being super deep, we Christians experience fun, and WANT to experience fun, just like the rest of the world. The difference is, I don't need mentally or emotionally altering chemicals in my body to do it. If I want to laugh uncontrollably over something silly, I can do it without touching a drop of alcohol. If I want to go on a junk food binge, I can do it without rolling up a single blunt. I don't need a reason. The joy that resides in my soul allows me to enjoy the simple things in life. 

     So here's the thing about being a Christian: If I want to dress up and put on makeup, I do. And I feel beautiful and special WITHOUT having to put all my goodies on display for the world to see. I don't have to turn my nose up at anyone else to make myself feel better. All I have to do is wake up in the morning, and know that my Father loves me, and I'm alright. Oh, and dancing?? Don't let me and my cousin Fay or my good friend Jahna hear some shouting music! Club? What club? We can get a praise break ANYWHERE, don't get it twisted! I have joy on purpose, and my joy comes WITH  purpose. It's not God's design for us to be repressed and upset. He wants us to be free, and total freedom is found in Him. 

4. Christians think they are better than non-Christians - This one hurts my heart, partly because some of the people who believe this, claim to be Christians. Let me get my own personal disclaimer out the way RIGHT NOW: I, Jalisa Arlene Barnes of Bed Stuy, Brooklyn, New York, do NOT think that I am, have ever been, or ever will be better than ANYONE else on this earth. I apologize to anyone who got that vibe from me in the past or present, and to anyone who will in the future (hope not!). The Bible clearly says that ALL of us have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). I find myself quoting this scripture a lot, and it's because it's so relevant to ME. I am nothing but a sinner who was saved by grace. Somebody loved me enough to lay down His life to pay for MY sins. I don't deserve it, and nothing that I could ever do will be enough to make up for it. All I can do is remember that "but for the grace of God, there go I..."

    What I will NOT apologize for, however, is living according to the standard that was set for anyone who claims to be a follower of Christ. I'm not here to make anyone feel bad about their decisions, and I won't allow others to make me feel bad about lining up my values with Biblical principles. All too often, I see people taking a stand against something they don't believe in, and getting beat up on because others see it as an affront to their own life choices. My deciding not to have sex before I'm married doesn't mean I'm looking down on someone else's decision to have premarital sex. It means that I made a decision to please God. I'm not thinking about anybody else. All I can go by is what the Bible says. If you don't make a practice of living according to Biblical principle, then I wouldn't expect you to live as I do. So why is it so hard to accept that us not conforming to the rest of the world's way of doing things has nothing to do with putting anyone else down? 

     So here's the thing about being a Christian: Yes, there is a criteria for someone who is saved. They have to confess with their mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in their heart that God raised Him from the dead (Romans 10:9-10). That's it. Going to church doesn't make you saved, helping the needy doesn't make you saved, not cursing doesn't make you saved, and not drinking, partying, or having sex doesn't make you saved. All of those things come about as a RESULT of being saved. The more you fashion your life after Christ, the less you WANT to do things that contradict His word. The more you fast and pray and read your Bible at home, the more you want to go to church and fellowship with other believers. You actually want to hear what the preacher says, because the message is usually a confirmation of something the you and the Lord discussed during the week. And guess what? God ALWAYS confirms His word!  

     Here is the low-down, the skinny, the real-deal, the swindle, the swizzle, the honest-to-God truth about Christianity. It's really NOT this exclusive club where everybody has to pretend to be something they're not. We're not at all perfect, and we don't expect those around us to be. Those who do, don't have a true understanding of who God is, or His design for us. We need to love one another, but we don't need to be pushovers. We need to stand up for the truth, but we don't need to knock other people down as we do it. We need to have fun, but we don't need to be out of control. We need to be content in every situation, but we don't need to pretend like things are better than they are. Sounds like a lot of contradictions, doesn't it? It may seem a little confusing, but that's the thing about being a Christian. When we allow God to lead us, He changes us from the inside, and gives us a balance that we can't achieve on our own. I can testify to wanting to tear into someone, and just as I'm about to go OFF, the Lord intervenes and either shuts my mouth or softens my words. Times when I wanted to do something crazy, not realizing how crazy it was at the moment, only to have the Lord make it so that I couldn't. And as disappointed as I may have been at the time, I can now thank God for sparing my life. The thing about being a Christian is that we can always rest easy knowing that we are safe in His arms. I don't know about you, but there's no place I'd rather be.